Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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