Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize
