She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
