My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Panties = found
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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