Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
