So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
