what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
