are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
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i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
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