Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize