I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
We are two peas in an std pod
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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