I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
