My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize