Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
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I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
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I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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