super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
