dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Randomize
