I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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