dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
another moral hangover. fuck.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
whose ass print is on the piano?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
