Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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