He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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