New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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