I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Randomize
