I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even the bartender felt bad for me
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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