is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
