So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
how do flat chested girls get laid?
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
