he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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