I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Randomize