You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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