I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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