my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I party with great urgency now.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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