You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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