Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i just had sex bonerless
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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