There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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