Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize