She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
