How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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