I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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