i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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