In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
