After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Randomize
