apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Randomize
