On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
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he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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