Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize