Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
