Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
being pregnant is like rehab
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
