You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
