Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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