I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Do you still have your period?
Barsexuality is the new black.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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