Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize
