I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
