Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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