Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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